Soon in a couple of years, I will touch the brigade of forty years plus people. I know being a woman how difficult is to take a gig at your age which is increasing day by day and despite all odds I am not able to pull it reverse. Well, there is nothing to brag and to discuss on age issues or how you can look much younger to your age. Aging is completely normal and it’s OKAY to have gray hair when you can proudly share your lifetime experience and learning through hardships.
But before you conclude anything I must say that here I am talking about all those things which have become abnormal with our sedentary lifestyles.
I know being in the hi-tech era it sounds perfectly fine when we discuss modernization, development and the changing era of human cycle. This is a cliché! But at large, there is something which is being missed at large and affecting us in all possible manners.
Let’s start with few conversations that I recently had with all age groups:
Say, a youngest one and as young as below ten years. Most of the conversations were about worrying about children. Parents are more concerned about aggressive behavior and the tiny lot is not getting proper sleep at night. Playing outdoor is like a picnic which happens rarely. Free play is just like a past and free time without any gadgets is just a joke. No one wants to let children get bored so they have all sort of ready entertainment available all the time.
Being a parent of two I really wonder how we had our childhood without any other sort of entertainment apart from playing in the scorching heat and amidst of dust and sand. In those times, our parents used to drag us inside so that our attention can be diverted to spend some time with them or with the school books. That was completely normal at that time.
But being surrounded and pampered with all the facilities at much younger age, why the aggression and behavioral challenges still on the rise?
Then I moved to the teenage group: The most complicated ones! And then you get to know the real meaning of generation gap when it becomes a herculean task to make them understand or vice-versa. Personally, I talked with few and realized that they are more worried about the jobs rather than following their passion. They are more inclined to realize those dreams which their parents had seen for them. They are nowhere happy the way they should be even if they are accompanied by the luxuries and facilities a family could afford to them. But anyways…..
With this ongoing communication to various age groups, I hopped to the most happening age group. The Independent, fierce, bold or one can say the twenties and the working class. Liberation, party, social media and fashion is their fad words. Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and the WhatsApp is their favorite pass time. But again why worries? You have what you thought of? Isn’t it? Then what is pestering you at this stage? What are you hankering up to? You don’t have any family responsibility to take care and the life with minimum commitments.
Is it Marriage, a Love affair or any other financial burden? Or any dream which you still have and not yet fulfilled. After all this entire group is of the most efficient ones and advising them for anything might be curbing their freedom of expression and the life which they want.
In continuation to this, I do have a lot of conversations with the much older group too.
Few of my age are struggling to get their own identity and the much older group is busy to mold the younger one in their shoes.
The only thing which I observed with all these age groups is the” lack of fearless and clear communication” and “living to be as normal”
But in today’s world what is being normal?
“To be happy and satisfied with non-materialistic things?”
“To get up early, breathing in fresh air and a morning walk”
“Breakfast without hurry”
“Saying Hi and Bye with a big Smile”
“A gadget free Dinner at one table with family”
“A cup of coffee with no arguments”
“Enjoying the present rather than worrying about the future”
“And the most important-An open-hearted communication with all”
I remember when we were young; we used to sleep on time. Like 10 at night and getting up early by 6 and so. The weekend had nothing to do with sleep patterns.
In Spite of busy schedules, we used to have at least one meal altogether where we used to discuss the day’s routine and how it went for us. And that was very loud and clear with the clear confessions.
Certainly, I have seen the change in work pattern in these two decades and how the stress has taken over all the priorities in everyone’s life.
The biggest thing is” We have actually forgotten to be just normal”
We don’t know when last we had played badminton or carom with our kids.
We missed so many birthday and anniversaries dinners and breakfast with a pleasure just for few e-mails.
We missed how our mom used to oil our hairs at least once a week to rejuvenate ourselves.
We didn’t realize that it’s been a long time when you had not taken your loved ones for dinner.
Spending a time for each other (whether quality or quantity) with each other without any expectations.
And how we had forgone to open our heart to our loved ones. Who says one never gets hardships and failures in their lives; who says relationships are very fragile; and who says all problems doesn’t have a single solution. And who says Only Perfection Prevails!
Being a little imperfect is completely OKAY and NORMAL.
During my lifetime and the hardships, I had the only thing I learned that few confessions with open hearts and the communication with others without thinking how the other fellow will judge you surely solve many of your problems and that’s completely normal. Let’s not think much how you would be judged on your words or behavior and may be tagged as a mentally ill person or a gormless idiot who cannot keep their so-called secrets to self. How does it matter if you confess your own feeling with others?
How does it matter if you want to pursue your passion over your highly paid job and how does it matter if being a married woman you want to travel the world just alone or maybe you are the one who just wants to spend your life by doing philanthropy work?
Honestly, you will be happier to connect and the inner happiness which you get being as normal is an entirely different and memorable experience.
Sometimes sleeping by ten, a fresh feel of the morning breeze, enjoying the rising sun with a cup of tea and letting your children drench themselves in the rain will refresh you like anything.
Letting your heart break the silence and speak whatever is there in your mind is just a start!